A Letter to Myself

My Tiny Buddha
April 6, 2017
Kudos to Zou!
May 29, 2017

Dear Me,
Yesterday I had a dream, and I saw you, a mother gloated and bloated, I miss being you. I remember you as a happy, blissful and content mother. It’s not long before you hold the most precious little thing in your life. Every time you go for ultrasound, you glow more. You are treated like a queen, no matter where you go. You don’t hesitate to ask strangers for a seat or  not to smoke around a pregnant lady. But mind you, this is the only time when you will be a mother sans worries.
Allow me to  tell you what lies ahead. A baby boy will come and fill your life with joy and happiness. You will fear your heart may explode with the love. But it won’t, it will just keep expanding to hold little more love. You will fear when the baby walks, not very soon. For that, you will have to wait, the baby will start running before he starts walking. Your next worry will be when does he call you ‘Ma’. Soon enough, and after that begins the incessant chatter. The ultimate struggle will be when does he start eating food properly? Even though, I’m 8 years older and (hopefully) wiser, I am still struggling. There will be a million other questions, for some you will find the answers soon, and for others you will have to wait longer. You must be wondering why am I writing a letter to you, and if time travel is possible? The answer to the former question is ‘to prepare you for the journey that you are about to embark’, and answer to the latter is, I so wish it was possible.
The most important thing that I can tell you is to don’t be paranoid about making everything right for the child. Let him be on his  own, make him responsible for his actions and thus prepare him for the repercussions of his acts. Let him understand the difference between the rights and wrongs, on his own. He will learn to deal with people and situations, himself. Give him easy chores and teach him how to do them correctly. When he is old enough, ask his help to do laundry, and in the course teach him a couple of tricks of the trade. Cook his special dish while he assists you as a co-chef, tell him ‘the secret ingredient’ with a wink. He can wash his bike, when you wash the car, singing a duet together.
I write this to you to help you understand that sometimes it’s alright to ”let it be”, and sometimes to ”let it go”. Every fault of his, doesn’t make you a bad mother. For every battle he faces, don’t be a shield around him or don’t try to be ‘the warrior’ to fight his battles. Instead, make him powerful enough to fight his own battles, and just stand beside him. Let him make mistakes, and allow yourself too. It’s alright to make mistakes, don’t be hard on yourself. Allow him to make mistakes, to learn, to grow. Enjoy his childhood with him.
Enjoy the moment of glory! Cheers!
Yours truly
P.S. Kiss him for me, while he is inside you.

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